The American scholar and anthropologist Joseph Campbell described brilliantly the basic desire humans have to emulate their idols as a way of perfecting their own lives, in a sense, to become better people by adopting their idol’s ’style’, their choice of dress & adornment, their lifestyles, their ‘look’, their sound, their all.

The notion of this statement rang true for me as I am a huge fan of so many celebrities and, yes, darn it, I, too have closets full of things and made purchases that an otherwise rational, sane, thinking person wouldn’t have.

I wore the Cindy Lauper crinolines, my Sarah Jessica Parker Manolo knock offs, the Oprah shawl (remember when she used to wear one over one shoulder…I thought that was so classy…), the Liza ‘bob’, the Emeril Lagasse pots and pans, and the list goes on…
So it was no surprise that when I began to study Middle Eastern dance that I would become smitten with some of the stars that I had met and especially those with whom I had studied!

Now…I am a relatively sane, thinking, educated, moderately balanced woman. But you couldn’t convince me ‘then’ and cannot convince me now that I will not be a better dancer by making a few purchases here and there that my idols have.

For instance, I worked for years on getting that slow, sensuous kneeling backbend that is the trademark of beloved artist Rayhana. I was doing well with my work, but one day, after her workshop, I purchased her performance video and got to watched in slow-mo rapture as she descended to the floor, achingly slow, powerfully, but with such grace! I was spellbound, smitten, obsessed. What WAS it she was doing that made her look so unique, so perfect?

It was the bedleh! YES…that fantastic black bedleh…or maybe it was the one with the pearls…oh sure…that must be it!

I headed straight for my computer and began my internet search for a costume maker who could do that for me…you know…make me a better dancer by wearing a black costume.

"Rub a lamp" was pretty much the response I got.

But…I got the bedleh. It’s not an exact copy, but it makes me FEEL like Rayhana when I descend to the floor…and I am certain that I am ‘channeling’ her energy when I do.
Is this wrong? I am feeling empowered by a woman I hold in high regard! My movements aren’t an exact copy…but I would never mind if that comparison were made!
But, as with all obsessions, it didn’t stop there. I wanted to be the BEST dancer, after all…

My desire to undulate like Neon with those gorgeous ribbon-like arms and body caused me to purchase a Shamedan. I can’t do the tall or the blond or the thin thing…but I can feel like the goddess she is now that I can balance fire!

How could I get my hips to explode from my lifts and drops like Jehan? Why it’s her metal Goddess attire! The addition of layers of silk veils and metal adornments makes me want to shimmy with abandon, to let my hips do the talking. I 3⁄4 walk with greater strength and power now.

Oh how I wanted to play zills. I was introduced to Aszmara at a NJ workshop and just became instantly smitten with this Sultana of Syncopation! How could I develop her technique? Her style? Her passion and power? Why…I needed to own her zills!!! Sure enough, a trip to the internet and I now play a sturdy pair of Turquoise International B-series zills…and I can maqsoum with the best of them (ok…that and about a dozen workshops with the Sultana!)!

One day, I sat waiting for my turn at a the hafla dance floor when Ayshe floated by, covered in one layer of iridescent fabric after another. Oh lord…the wings, the WINGS! Need I say more? I own two sets.

Amira Mor’s body? Fugghetaboutdit. DNA you can’t purchase online!

After taking a Rachel Brice workshop I felt a strong desire to get my already kuchi-jewelry festooned body more ink.

I think these talismans do really serve an emotional purpose for me. Like most performers, I didn’t start out feeling secure about my dancing…by borrowing these bits of style from my idols (and attending many of their classes, workshops and purchasing their DVDs,) I borrowed a little bit of their strength.

My pesky little sister copied me a lot. I hated it. My mother told me that emulation is the most sincere form of flattery.

I hope that my Idols are flattered. I am a better dancer because of you.